Give yourself Grace: What if it really is that damn phone?

It’s the first fresh summer morning of the year. You’ve woken up to the sound of birds singing. The blinds are still shut, but the bright halo of a clear sky is creeping around the window. You stretch and roll over, your right hand landing on the cold screen of your phone. As you tap it, light hits the backs of your eyes, jolting you with that familiar ache. You squint at various network updates from LinkedIn, two Instagram likes, and your flat WhatsApp group chat asking who didn’t shut the fridge properly last night. It was you. Your stomach drops. Everyone’s chicken has gone off, and the cheesecake is now melting over everything. Sighing, you tap into Instagram. Surely, a nice scroll will take your mind off things? The fitness influencer you followed last week has posted a ‘workout for abs in three weeks’ video. They’ve already been on a 10k ‘wellness walk’. You roll back over.

Checking your phone first thing in the morning flushes any wellness ambitions you had down the toilet

A few months ago, this was me. And if it sounds like you too, you’re in the right place. So I’ll warn you now: there’ll be no hand-holding when I say that maybe it really is that damn phone. Checking your phone first thing in the morning flushes any wellness ambitions you had down the toilet. The tiny dopamine kicks you get from notifications mean you crash almost immediately afterwards. Unfortunately, opening social media only makes matters worse. You start your day with the impending sense of dread that while everyone else is having the best time in the world (with the best career and the best diet to match), you’re on your phone in bed.

This isn’t just about your self-worth, either. The negative impact of using your phone first thing reaches as far as your physiology. Specifically your circadian rhythm, the internal clock that regulates your 24-hour cycle. It makes sure you function how you need to, when you need to. But one of its key triggers for optimal morning functioning is daylight. So if you wake up to the blue light of a phone screen instead, it sets you off on the wrong track. This brings me to step one in my new morning routine: let daylight in as soon as you wake up. This is the perfect hack for when the sun rises early in the coming summer months. If throwing the curtains open feels like too much at first, just focus on any natural light in your room, and let your eyes get used to it. You’ll find that as you make this a habit, you’ll naturally feel less groggy and more motivated to start your day.

Habits really are the cornerstone of happy and healthy living

Once you’ve adjusted to some natural light it’s time for the second step: take three deep breaths. Now, I know this sounds like a wellness cliché, but I find it actually sets the tone for the rest of my day. Whether you do this lying down, sitting or standing, it signals two things to your body. Firstly, that you aren’t in any immediate danger, and this means you can start your day in a state of calm. Secondly, you’re showing it care: despite it being a tiny portion of your day, the time it takes to complete three deep breaths is time you’re taking for your wellbeing. It never fails to amaze me how different this feels to the impending dread of the doom-scroll.

With that being said, there are a few positive ways to use your phone as you’re starting your day (once you’ve completed steps one and two). Often, I’ve planned out my day the night before, so that all I have to do is check my notes to see what time I need to leave the house. This makes for immediately stress-free mornings. Even more often, I send a ‘good morning’ text to my partner and family to remind myself how grateful I am to love, be loved, and have brilliant people in my life. What I’ve learned from implementing this morning routine is that habits really are the cornerstone of happy and healthy living. And the best part? It can start with just two steps.