Not quite ‘adulting’

Undoubtedly ‘adulting’ is hard, but the hardest part is comprehending when we’re really adults. Legally, we are adults at the age of 18 but if you were to ask me whether I was ready to be an adult during my first year of university the answer would be an awkward, unsure laugh.

Why? Because I am still learning what it really means to be an adult, look after myself and blossom into the person I have aspired to be since I was little. And, to be honest I think so are the rest of my friends and young adults around me.

You have to manage your time wisely with things you have to do and the things that you want to do

I remember thinking one day, when I am older after university I will have a job, a house and may be even a family. And to be honest, at my young age with my innocent and naïve mind I thought this would be all be normal by the age of around 30, and it is only now that I am starting to realise how young and naïve that really was.

Being an adult is hard work. You have to manage your time wisely with things you have to do and the things that you want to do, and I don’t just mean the work life balance. I am talking about looking after yourself; keeping your surroundings clean, staying healthy, nurturing the relationship in your life and most importantly taking time for yourself to look after yourself.

I am the youngest in my family, I am cursedly clumsy and often still have to ask my friends and family for help in doing basic and menial tasks.

People need people and you can’t really expect to look after yourself without sometimes needing someone

A huge problem that is part of ‘adulting’ for many young people is the basic and necessary skill of being able to cook a nutritional meal and stay healthy. I too struggle with this and often still have to ask my flatmates for help when trying to cook something, and although I have improved since first year when I was making frequent calls to my mum about recipes, I still find it difficult to find the energy and time to cook a proper meal without wandering back to frozen or instant meals.

Despite saying that, I don’t think it’s bad that I am asking for help, shying behind some instant meals and most important of them all, I am really not ashamed of calling up my mum when faced with minor inconveniences in my life. In fact, I think most of us still do that; whether that be calling up my parents before making important career and financial decisions or even just telling them about smaller setbacks in my day. People need people and you can’t really expect to look after yourself without sometimes needing someone to tell you that you have tried your best no matter how life is going.

I plan on doing my best, making mistakes and learning from them

Although I do think it would have been better if we had been taught how to deal with some of the scarier part of adulthood in school like how to pay your bills, how to cook a healthy meal and how to get a job in school, I don’t really think that’s what ‘adulting’ is really about. In fact, I do not think ‘adulting’ is something that can be taught. I think learning as many new skills as you can is an important part of life but most of all being open to learn, and making mistakes is the most important lesson of them all. Adults make mistakes too, and I really hope we stop dismissing our efforts when we try something new because we think making mistakes is a childish trope.

I am still going to send my mum a picture when I cook a really nice meal and still feel extremely accomplished when I clean my room because why would you not? I plan on doing my best, making mistakes and learning from them. I don’t think I will ever reach a point when I have blossomed into who I want to be because who really is that? You live and you learn, and if I want to keep being the best version of myself, the best ‘adult’ I can be then I don’t ever want to reach an end, I want to keep going- that’s the best we can all do.