Don’t be deceived by celeb DVDs

Holiday pounds weighing you down and thinking of buying a fitness DVD? Reece Goodall warns us not to…

Christmas is well and truly over, but some things remain constant. The panic of knowing deadlines are just around the corner and you haven’t done any of your assignments. The sheer joy of lying in bed when outside is just a bit too cold. And the sure-fire knowledge that, when you turn on the television, you have to suffer some celebrity promoting their fitness DVD.

Yes, it’s that time of the year when you get to feel bad about yourself because all celebrities worked themselves healthy and you are sitting there, a fat slob after stuffing yourself with turkey and chocolate. But fear not – these lycra-clad telly harridans are willing to share their secrets with you. You too can be built like Davina McCall, and all you have to do is shell out for her DVD. All that, and you get to do it in the comfort of your living room – it’d be mad not to.

Now is the time to gravitate towards high quality investment pieces that you’ve been eyeing on sale…

But here’s the deal. Britain, as a nation, is getting fatter than ever, even though these DVDs are selling more than ever. The annoying opportunism of these celebrities, knowing that they are cashing in on (whilst lowering) your self-esteem, is the underlying implication that you’re not as good as them and you won’t be unless you hand over your money.

I’ve no doubt that these measures work for them, but fitting a celebrity model onto an ordinary person’s life isn’t right and it won’t work. We have more important things to do with our time – people are too busy working, doing chores, whatever you’d like, to waste an hour and a half following an elaborate fitness routine. Not to mention, of course, that this routine isn’t the be-all and end-all – we also don’t have a personal trainer like the celebs do, standing around flattering them and handing them blended fennel shakes (or something stupid like that) before they go back to their insulting day job of baring their arse for money or something.

If we’re honest, the only way to get fit is to eat better and to move around a lot. By adding celebrities into the mix, however, it has become an excuse to make people trying to get fit feel worse about the whole endeavour, and render them out of pocket as an added bonus. Still, on the bright side, when you’re sitting on the sofa, crisps in hand lamenting your inability to shift those pounds, at least you know you have Davina McCall and her stupid intricate workout to blame for it.