Fresh affairs

Whether you’re a fresh first-year or a finalist preying on the innocent, Fresher’s Fortnight is the perfect time to get all the friskiness out of your system. But if you don’t play your cards right, what you wanted to be short and sweet may end up being a long, messy nightmare that will haunt you for the whole of your Uni days.

The golden rule to remember when finding suitable fling material is to avoid hooking up with someone you’re going to have to see for the rest of the year. This includes, in order of both probability and awkwardness: someone in your corridor (a.k.a. “dormcest”), someone in your seminar class (painful group work), or a PhD student that could turn out to be your tutor (being marked on your sexual performance rather than academia).

Warwick may seem like a huge place when you first get here, but after a while you realise that it’s actually tiny. So make sure you at least strike up a semi-decent conversation before going in for the kill, and keep your ears peeled for other red flag zones.

A popular fresher faux pas is doing the dirty with someone who already has a significant other back at home, and sometimes this isn’t because they’re hiding it, but just because you didn’t ask. Another area to avoid is someone with a broken heart – as much as being the rebound guy/girl sounds like the perfect way to keep it short, it will be hard to have something casual and fun with someone who’s still nursing old wounds.

Once you’ve zeroed in on the lucky lad or lady, don’t forget that not everyone is looking for quick fling just ‘cause it’s Fresher’s Fortnight – to assume so can result in you making a rather big fool out of yourself and ruining your chances completely. So even though you’re not expected to court them for weeks, just don’t take it too fast or push them too hard and end up blowing it.

Most importantly, remember that it is a fling, so don’t let yourself get too emotionally or physically attatched or complications can make things end messily and painfully. If it turns into something more, don’t object to it either, but fun and casual is the best idea for a fresher fling.

Finally, remember to stay safe. Free contraception is available all over campus (e.g. Nightlife, the Health Centre) so don’t get lazy and end up regretting your Fresher fling.

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