Handling Homesickness

It was a mere two months after my eighteenth birthday that I was driven for two-and-a-half-hours from my South Wales home to become a fresher at the University of Warwick. I was forced to temporarily leave the friendship group I had been a part of since I was five years old. It was with these friends that I grew up with in my local primary school, survived the bear pit that was also my village-based secondary school, and, finally, the same college. On the home front, it was a tragic fact that I barely spent more than a fortnight away.

I coasted for eighteen years, but I eagerly awaited university, for it was to be the greatest change to my life. I was the only one of my four siblings to study outside of Wales. The University of Warwick, City of Stars, beckoned. I arrived at Heronbank and two hours later, my parents sped away from my new front door. I was alone now, except for the geese. Yet I was free! I imagined all the possibilities for myself with my newfound independence – I could have pasta for breakfast and toast for dinner. I could have pasta on toast! I felt that independence. I felt in control of my future. I felt homesick.

We never matched the ecstatic flats that routinely appeared on social media with photos of the night before.

I struggled to adjust during those first weeks. The almighty accommodation computer had housed me with the loveliest people, but we never matched the ecstatic flats that routinely appeared on social media with photos of the night before. In my mind, I harshly compared them to the friends that dominated my life before university.

The much-discussed Warwick bubble turned out to be a double-edged sword. It was at times of happiness in the first term that the close proximity to everyone felt like a blessing. I still adore the “we’re all in this together” attitude that seems to resonate through campus. However, while I admit it is cliché to comment on loneliness whilst surrounded by many, it is something I felt. For me, it was based on the occasional difficulties to form genuine connections or the result of stupidly comparing my social life to the more extroverted students, and my stress-free home friends.

The National Union of Students believes between 50 and 70 percent of students experience homesickness.

Homesickness that term distracted my engagement with my course, and, crucially, the term where connections are made. But as second term ended three months later, I felt far less homesick. I had settled and become closer to the friends I had. The intensity of homesickness dwindled as university continued into second year. By the conclusion of the first term in my second year, I did not want to return home.

I was not alone in my homesickness at the beginning of first year. The National Union of Students believes between 50 and 70 percent of students experience homesickness at UK universities. But do not despair: there are many solutions to the problem.

Like with most troubles in life, time is the greatest healer. I hope new freshers will adjust and not take the difficulties of the first few days or weeks to heart like I did. I cannot say for sure when the adjustment period ends and your newfound confidence will blossom, for every case is special. You’ll hopefully find that comfortability with more and more university experience under your belt – you’re changing and maturing, for the better.

Find time to invite friends from your past to the university for a weekend, if possible.

There are also ways to make the separation from home feel less extreme. Find time to invite your friends from your past to the university for a weekend, if possible. Look at your transport options. Increase the amount of times you talk to your friends or parents on the phone or Skype.

Societies are the perfect distraction, and indeed the perfect place to meet other like-minded individuals. It does not matter whether the society is one of the smallest or the largest, I have nothing but positives to say. For the international students, there are societies based on nationality, religion and language. You might just meet some of your favourite people in your university life at a society. I know I have.

I understand it is difficult to communicate your problems, especially in first year where there is a pressure to be always fun. Nobody wants to be an emotional burden on people they’ve just met. But people will understand, whether friends or flatmates. Homesickness is entirely normal and everyone feels it. The university itself also offers counselling services, with the website providing guidance on the problem.

It is perfectly rational to be homesick, and I hope that any anxious fresher reading this will eventually find happiness at the University of Warwick.