Welcome to Warwick

Lauren Steele provides an A-Z guide of all the things you need to know for an amazing first year!

To save your confusion, time, shock and regrets in the early weeks, I have compiled an A-Z list of lingo, tips and home truths. These should enable you to find your feet faster and get you on to the good stuff…

‘ANAL, now I’ve got your attention’. – This is pretty much the winning formula used on posters across campus. Funny the first time, annoying the second time.

Boar – This is our newspaper, FYI, you’re reading it.

Bubble – This is the campus’ nickname. Self-explanatory.

Copper Rooms – The floor is sticky, it’s terrible unless you have pre-drunk to excess and sadly, after freshers’, you will only step foot inside for Skool Dayz and Pop!

Down it fresherrrrrrrrr! – Our signature drink is ‘purple’, a sickly combination of cider, beer and blackcurrant. So you might as well get used to that taste sensation and the staple accompanying line, “down it fresher!”

Europeans – That slicked back hair, preppy clothing, sexy accent, yes, you will be a sucker for them and yes, they’ll all be WBS students. But hey, you could get a free trip to Europe, or at least a night to remember…

Forty percent – At A’ Level, 40% was a cause for concern, at university, it is a cause for celebration. Obviously you should aim higher, but sometimes 40% is simply the greatest result ever.

Gossip – Everyone knows everyone, fact! Don’t think for a second that now you’ve left school and are all fancy at university, that it all changes. It’s ‘Skool Dayz’ every day here and you will always have mutual friends with that new person you have met… (Bear this in mind when choosing who you take home, ahem!)

Humanities students – Jokes will be made about the little number of contact hours and few exams. So either the joke’s on you or you’ll be making them.

Incest – Flat incest will occur, you may be able to map it out extensively, or it may be minimal. But, trust me when I say it will occur…

Jaegermonster – Neon, the newly refurbished Evolve in Leamington, will fill you full of cheap jaegerbombs every other Friday. As a result, you will wake up with some of the worst hangovers known to man.

Kelseys – The home of bright green jugs of eliminator. Enjoy.

Library – You will get tetchy when people take up entire tables for skyping and there are no other seats in sight. On the flipside, if said table hogger wanders from their desk for more than half an hour, they will receive a pink slip and you can jump in their grave and nab that table.

“Muuuum” – Yep that’s it, you’re on your own, so group up and handle your cooking and laundry like grown men. In the words of Jersey Shore, GTL. M is also for Microwave, your new best friend.

“No-one fails first year” – FALSE, I am living proof of this. Please ensure you get 40% on every module, re-sits are no fun.

Overheard at Warwick – The Facebook group where rape jokes, in-depth discussions on class and hatred for Coventry breed quicker than anywhere else.

Pop! – I tagged along to this in freshers’ and was clueless as to why people were beyond drunk at 10pm and why there were so many different fancy dress themes. So here’s a quick breakdown of Pop!: Arrive at 7pm in your societies’ chosen fancy dress theme, ‘circle’ (3 hours of necking purple), fail to remember the rest of the night and possibly do a cheeky stride of pride back to your humble abode in the morning. Also, winning best dressed is the greatest feeling in the world.

‘Queuing after you’ve queued?’ – Yep, you will have to queue once to get into Smack and a second time to go (fall) downstairs to the room with lots of lights. Chances are you won’t remember the anger/cold you felt whilst queuing the night before, so not really an issue.

Room numbering – Had I realised that the lecture/seminar rooms were cleverly numbered, I may have actually attended more (lies). Example: S2.77 = Social Sciences building, Floor 2, Room 77. Now you can’t use that excuse, hah!

Submissions – Chances are you will remember to submit a physical copy of your work on the deadline, but some courses require a copy to be submitted online. To avoid disappointment, please remember to e-submit!

Textbooks – People genuinely hide them around the library, so if your wanted book is annoyingly not on the shelf, you probably won’t find it. Check the sliding bookcase, my friend swore by that hiding spot.

Uni Express – Going to Gatecrasher, Birmingham without paying for taxis? Amazing news, until you need a piss on the bus. Even so, it’s still the cheapest way to go, hands down.

Virgins – Apparently, here at Warwick, 11% of us are. That’s one in every nine people you’re going to meet.

WBS students – I will leave you to form an opinion of them when you arrive, but there is a uni-wide general consensus already in place.

Xananas – It’s on campus, give it a go? (nothing to report here, try finding a word beginning with X)

Y u so far away Westwood? – The student postroom is located in Westwood, so as exciting as getting a parcel is, walking there and back to receive it will take away any excitement you had.

Zzzzz – you will sleep through most 9ams, but sometimes a fire alarm will wake you up. Yay!

There we have it, you now have several insights into life within the ‘bubble’. Take this information away and do with it as you please, enjoy!