Summer lovin’

We’ve all done it: harboured secret, romantic fairytale visions of arriving on a desert island and bumping into our soul mate. It was fate, obviously… cue the story of your friend’s sister’s boyfriend’s cousin who fell in love in Indonesia and decided to elope, never to return to cold and rainy England again, Eat, Pray, Love-style. I think we can all agree that the travelling romance very rarely pans out that way.

Occasionally, though, you might‘click’ with someone. You might even agree to meet up. Before you know it, you’re enjoying the company. You joke about travelling together. BOOM. It happened so fast. Suddenly, you’re in a temporary relationship.

Don’t panic, this isn’t all bad. If you fall in temporary-love this summer, simply follow these steps to banish the bad and ensure you don’t lose your mind. The first and most important step: set a time limit on this ‘relationship’, be realistic about what it is, i.e. temporary, and never falter. No, you will not replace university with matching hippy tattoos and a shits-and-giggles wedding wearing flip flops on the beach. This is neither the time nor the place to forget education and get romantic. No, it’s not acceptable to feign malaria to skip the first term of your third year to prolong the loving. Just no.

Enduring the immense struggles, the sickness, the late buses, the dirty hostels, the thirty-hour train rides, the foreign language, all with someone you have just met is nothing short of a nightmare.

What if you kind of cheat on your kind of boyfriend? How guilty should you feel when your kind of relationship has had an expiry date on from day one? I’ll be honest, not very. After a few too many shots of rice wine, please, for the love of God, remind yourself this is a temporary commitment. Bad habits are unavoidable and aggravating. You don’t tend to realise someone is a tea slurper or a sleep-walker until you are in too deep, but don’t let habits that make your skin crawl get to you too much. Remember that it doesn’t have to be all or nothing – why not agree to split for a few days every few weeks, so you can enjoy the independence to take some breathing space?

The goodbye, whether your time together was flawless or full of bickering, will be difficult. Remember that your feelings will probably be blown out of proportion: keep things in perspective. Travelling is intense. You’re spooning every night, you’re going through a ‘life-changing experience’ together, and you’re sharing an abundance of wonderful memories between only the two of you. It’s easy to get caught up in the romance, even easier to attribute your happiness to your companion instead of the trip.

Don’t avoid romance altogether, but remember what you left home for. Don’t allow a little loving to turn your Ray-Bans into rose-tinted glasses. You won’t ever see the person again, so every decision should be a selfish one. Have a great trip.